4:32 p.m. - 2001-10-28
Sentinence
I'm glad that I am back home now (I am back home from everything that happened). From everything that happened I have learned a lot...It was so overwhelming to see all of these different things that take place that most humans, I think, are not aware of. It was like living in a whole different world.But the thing is I was n't scared it was more or less a catious quiet gray area and me floating through the world.
I really miss Tam. I wish she wasn't dead. I'm so sad to think of her alone in the graveyard it FUCKING SUCKS.I am coming to think maybe the reason I didn't want her to die was because I don't want to die and to see someone like me die is something that makes me sad.
I have (had) this scary belief that no-one in the world really cares about anyone. When someone likes someone it is for their own benefit.
I read this thing the other day that said that humans are the only creatures that communicate through speech and talking to one another. At first I was thinking, well now I am thinking: "bullshit, how don't they know that other animals communicate through what they call'speech' or their definition of speech (definitions and words being mother fuckers anyway that make humans fucked up in the first place).
I just remebered I have previously spoken of Ethan in previous entries. I am pretty sure he hates me...I am probably pretty much what he never wants to become...are all humans such sentinent sensitive creatures?
