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5:17 p.m. - 2005-05-25
The Best Words I've Written In Years
Dear Vicky ([email protected]) I took the pics with an instant camera disposable. I have been eating salads so hope that will help. I was just almost like you years ago about 5 years ago I was into God because I was kind of open to God and more closed to the world. and I was a more positive thinking person. But now My dady would say "I opened myself up to the devil" i.e. by listening to worldly music, i made out with a guy once, I ran away from home and even considered doing dancing as a profession in a girls club, i put red extensions in my hair..... But I will close myself to the world again I think and become closer to God...it is a sacred place. The more you close yourself to the world the sacreder you get and the more you see beauty in small things. I used to be at that place. A plain girl. I want to and I will get back to that place soon. Once I find my solace and solidity. That's another thing you need and that Jesus had. He had peace that passeth all understanding. I always cry when I think of Jesus dying usually. I used to have many sacred moments enjoying the sky. But now it's like my enjoyment is in guys, and thinking about sex and bad things that I never really did before. I think physics is interesting. I've heard of relativity. There is a cool site wikpedia.com this cool guy told me about that I met at the library. Even the guy I met might not have been someone who I should have hung out with. Tell me your thoughts. Ask me your questions. I just feel really sacred today. I think it's because I got my room made over and have been listening to only the radio and not filling up my mind with having intimate relations with the doctor on the unit and the guy I told you about Bill. I have to stop judging people too. I have been doing that alot.

-Lydia

 

 

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